jonas & julia eff – usa
32 pages – quarter size / A6-ish
in julia eff’s own words:
AWAKE AND UNAFRAID // ASLEEP OR DEAD
I want to get this out into the world, but I don’t know what to say. I never know what to say. There are so many stories I haven’t told because I don’t know how to put them and I’m worried the words I come up with won’t do them justice.
A LIGHT THAT NEVER GOES OUT is a zine about mortality by two people sure they shouldn’t be here–one standing at the very edge of nothingness, hanging on by the thinnest thread, having seen how far the pit goes and how dark it is & the other one miles from the precipice but convinced their time is any minute now & living in the paralyzing shadow of the fear of it. It’s about someone who thinks they’re a ghost, and someone who only sees ghosts. It’s about watching your life sneak away from you & living consumed with the dread that it is. It’s about hospitals, surgery, loss, legacies, hospice, minivans. Feeling like you’re never enough. Cobwebs & ugliness & unreality. No comfort of an afterlife. This is your life, this is what you get. What the fuck are we doing here?
32 pages of the deepest ruminations on death & nothingness & what it means to disappear or be a living ghost by Jonas & me.
Typewritten (his), handwritten (mine), collaged, quarter size (4.25″ x 5.5″), photocopied with love; cover art by Heather Kelly (Sick Pleasure).